The Douche-tastic Duo Has Done it Again.

So . . . I normally wouldn’t blog about celebrities but, thanks to Spencer Pratt’s total and utter douchebaggery on the Tyra Banks Show, I’ve decided to say “eff it!” and take the plunge.

Apparently, the topic of adoption came up while Spencer and the other half of the douche-tastic duo were on Tyra’s show. Naturally she asked what they would name their adopted kids and—true to form—Heidi and Spencer opened their mouths and spewed forth a tidal wave of douchery unseen since the time Tom Cruise jumped up and down on Oprah’s sofa.

Here’s the transcript:

Tyra: So what would you name your children . . . like Speidi or Hencer . . . or something?
Heidi: He wants to name one Dunk.
Tyra: Dunk?!
Spencer: No, ’cause I mean, this is when I was saying I wanna go to Africa and I wanna adopt an African and . . . he’s gonna be very tall and he’s gonna be Dunk . . . you know . . ..
Tyra: Like to dunk the ball? I thought you meant ba-dunk-a-dunk, like have a big booty.
Spencer: Yeah, I mean . . . that’ll work . . . if it’s a girl . . ..
Heidi: [giggling moronically].

There’s also a clip from The Soup on Youtube. Spencer and Heidi’s supreme demonstration of douchiness doesn’t come until six-and-a-half minutes into the clip, so jump ahead if you can’t wait to see douchery at its finest (the video will make you wish Tyra had shoved her mic into a part of Spencer’s anatomy where the sun traditionally don’t shine, but she doesn’t—proving once again that there is no God).

Now we know that when Spencer thinks African, he thinks basketball and big butts. That’s OK though, ’cause when I think douche, I think Spencer Pratt. In fact, I think I’ll go to LA and adopt him. Then I’ll name him Douche . . . ’cause I mean . . . you know . . . I want to give my kid a name he’ll live up to . . . and . . . well . . . I can’t think of anyone who better lives up to that name than Spencer Pratt.

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9 thoughts on “The Douche-tastic Duo Has Done it Again.

  1. PaSorie,

    You missed the entire point on the article. The article isnt against adopting kids from Africa, its against Spencer’s stereotypical views: that all Africans are tall and play basketball. Also as a side note, I’m dissapointed Tyra failed to call Spencer out on his steorotypical almost racist views.

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  2. Pa Sorie,

    My main point in this post was to call out Spencer Pratt (and by association, Heidi Montag) for his ignorance. How are you going to talk about adopting a tall African kid and naming him dunk?

    As for other celebrity adoptions, I’m not 100% comfortable with them, but I wouldn’t go so far as to say they should be outlawed. On one hand, I worry about what it will do to the kid to grow up in an environment that is completely alien and different from the one in which they were born? For example, I know a few Asian people (South Korean, Vietnamese, Filipino) who were adopted by White families in the US, and who’ve wrestled with identity and self-esteem issues all their lives. I’m not saying this is proof that international/interracial adoptions are bad: I just wish the parents were better sensitized to and educated about social, cultural, racial, and psychological issues that might come into play in such adoptions.

    But the news isn’t all bleak. My mom works at a Russian school where a lot of the kids are adoptees from Russia (or the former Soviet Union), with American adoptive parents. These parents seem better-informed because they allow the kids to stay connected to their home cultures, speak Russian to the kids at home, send them to a Russian school, etc. This way, the kids are not completely cut off and compelled to live in an environment in which they have no connection to their home societies.

    So, I know this has nothing to do with the original point of my post, but I just wanted to answer your question.

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  3. Abdule great write up. But let us try to keep things in line. Are you against people going to Africa adopting kids and attempting to give them possiblities they might not have if they stay in africa or are you simply against the name that she stated to give the child? What do you think about Madonna adopting the child from Malawi

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  4. Abdul, are you on hiatus? I’m getting tired of looking at my T’ings ‘n Times RSS feed and seeing ‘Douche-tastic Duo’. Anyway, if you’d like to watch “celebrity” douchebags being called out as the douches they are, I’d recommend The Soup on the E! channel. No, I don’t work for E!, but the show keeps me sane. Speaking of working for E!, remember Guiliana “with a G”? Man, she sure liked to hump in college. Wonder how she got that job, anyway. Hmmmmm. Hard work and dedication, I suppose.

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