Does that Dildo Come in Black?

After spending the past week chest-deep in the James Watson racism brouhaha, it’s nice to get back to my standard fare of sleazy blog posts. And what could be sleazier than a dead Baptist minister? A dead Baptist minister in conservative Alabama clad head-to-toe in a rubber outfit and hogtied, that’s what! Oh, I forgot to mention he had a dildo in his . . . um . . . let’s just say he put it where the sun don’t shine. And by that, I mean his anus.

That’s right, folks, another conservative, anti-sex, anti-abortion, anti-gay, family-values Christian fundamentalist has been outed for being a total hypocrite. It is tragic that the Rev. Gary M. Aldridge’s outing coincided with his death, but the point remains that he was privately indulging in activities that he publicly denounced. Aldridge, an associate of the late Jerry Falwell, had ministered for 16 years at the Thorington Road Baptist Church in Montgomery, Alabama.

The autopsy report—which had been suppressed by the medical examiner’s office since June—was just this month published by The Smoking Gun. It seems the late Reverend Aldridge was found dead in his home and there were no signs of foul play. Here’s an excerpt from the autopsy report:

The decedent is clothed in a wet diving suit, a face mask which has a single vent for breathing, a rubberized head mask having an opening for the mouth and eyes, a second rubberized suit with suspenders, rubberized male underwear, hands and feet have diving gloves and slippers. There are numerous straps and cords restraining the decedent. There is a leather belt around the midriff. There is a series of ligatures extending from the hands to the feet. The hands are bound behind the back. The feet are tied to the hands. There are nylon ligatures holding these in place with leather straps about the wrists and ankles. There are plastic cords also tied about the hands and feet with a single plastic cord extending up to the head and surrounding the lower neck. There is a dildo in the anus covered with a condom.”

In case you have trouble conjuring up a mental image, just visualize “the gimp” from Pulp Fiction, only hogtied. The best part is the personal effects, listed on the bottom of page 4 of the autopsy report: “One yellow metal ring intact on left ring finger, one dildo.” Talk about having something embarrassing on your permanent record!

On a more serious note, at least one other blogger has raised the possibility that the reverend was not alone when he died; I too have to wonder if it’s possible for someone to tie himself up that completely without some help. After all, his hands were tied behind his back, with his feet tied to his hands. If someone else had been with the reverend when he asphyxiated, how sad is it that this person—probably out of shame—chose to escape and protect his or her own identity rather than get the help that may have saved Aldridge’s life?!

And what’s up with the wetsuits? I’m assuming the reverend would have had a really hard time finding a proper latex fetish suit in a state that had just banned the sale of dildos—he probably supported the ban too! Fortunately for Reverend Aldridge, diving gear was apparently still legal. Unfortunately for him, indulging in bondage in an open and safe way is not widely accepted in his circles. Otherwise, he might still be alive.

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4 thoughts on “Does that Dildo Come in Black?

  1. Hey there, Abdul….
    The only thing I question is your comment concerning the illegality of dildos in Alabama. Not sure where that info came from, but I can assure you dildos are definately not illegal here in Alabama. My wife and I have a nice selection that we get from an adult clothing store here in Birmingham. And, no…they are not hidden in some back room. Right out there on the floor on display counters. Just sayin’…

    LWG

    Like

  2. Hi there, I could not see any means to email you, and so I really hope that you read this comment. I have a website about ladies wetsuits, and thought you might like to swap links with me. I have submitted my email address in case you choose to get in contact. Thank you.

    Like

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